Sinking&Swimming.

Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:27:35 GMT

So I really only write in here once a year, but I want to try to post more. I guess that means I have to do a year in review type of post. I will catch up on 2008, before I resume to try and document 2009.

January 2008:
+Spent the new year in Alabama. Which is the last time I ever had to travel to that PLACE.

February:
+Took a couple of trips to Griffin, Georgia to visit Danny while he was at work down there. Stayed in a haunted hanger, that held hundreds of crashed airplanes and commercial jets.
+Had Valentine's day with Caitlin, drunk in the city.

March:
+Trips to Baltimore began. At first I was just visiting Danny, then I realized something was going on here...
+Danny noticed a lump in my breast.

April:
+Had surgery to have breast tumor removed.
+Fell in love with sports bras.
+Had a number of family scuffles, due to a certain step sister. :/

May:
+Got accepted to Towson.
+Packed up my life, and broke it to the family I was moving to Maryland.

June:
+Moved to Towson.
+Obtained a MarleyMoose.

July:
+Danny's family is the first to visit our little house.
+Gained a nephew, Andrew. :D

August:
+Started school. Home sick.
+Bought a stolen car.
+Started working for Young Rembrandts.

September:
+Realized it was a stolen car.
+Attempted to leave Danny. :/
+24 hour visit back to Chicago.
+Turned 21.

October:
+Attempted to leave Danny again.
+Danny gets into a car accident.
+Hospitalized for bronchitis and pneumonia.
+Marley hospitalized for stitches busting while in Petsmart.

November:
+Made my first Thanksgiving dinner. First holiday without my family.

December:
+Home to Chicago for Christmas and New Years.

January 2009:
+Hospital again for a flu that just won't quit.
+Spent many weekends in the hospital trying to name my stomach/digestion issues.

February:
+ Where did February go? And what did I accomplish?

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 02:12:29 GMT

WE GOT A PUPPY!

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 04:16:29 GMT

I give you Marley Moose.

Girlfriend is always sreepy.

X-POSTED, Summer Air.

Mon, 05 May 2008 22:04:44 GMT

Finally I can open the windows. Chicago is always the last city to welcome summer. I said I wouldn't put shorts on these pale thighs, but I gave in today when I started sweating in my normally freezing room.

We had lunch outside today. The trees are still bare, but the grass came back to life this weekend.

My feets are free!

Close city houses:

I wanted to share pictures from my last summer. I lived in Alabama, on the edge of the most beautiful swap/marsh thing. When I was there I actually didn't really appreciate it, but when I smell Chicago pollution coming through the windows, I remember how sweet the air smells in the South.

My backyard.

My blue heron friend. I have tons of pictures of him, he always let me get really close to him.

I can't find pictures of my white goose friend, so here's another heron picture.

The trees grow out of the water.

Clean and sweet simple Alabama.

Fri, 02 May 2008 03:18:00 GMT

I am moving to Baltimore. Sent in my acceptance letter today.
Holy shit, here comes the rest of my life.

(Gonna be a Tiger again.) :]

TXT ME.

Mon, 03 Mar 2008 03:39:01 GMT

Circa March 2007.
Film Studio Final.

Almost a year?!

Tue, 15 Jan 2008 21:03:49 GMT

Whoa hoa. Almost a year since I last posted. Gave up because I'm the only one who reads this thing, but then today I realized I like reading it. So cheers.

I should recap all the things I didn't post about over the past 10ish months. When I think about it 2007 really should have been the year documented. Whatever, I'll put it all in this one, and then it will all have exsisted in my LJ world. Cool. Okay.

So we left off last year end of March, in South Beach. Well S.B. was dirty and I'm not 21.. so Daniel and I went to another hotel outside Miami, which to date has been my favorite. Best bathroom ever.

April:
1. I decided to not return to School of the Art Institute.
2. Short term job at Victoria Secret. Obtained 3 free bras.
3. Red Hot Chili Peppers show.

May:
1. Lost touch with Emily after school ended, in so many words.
2. Sad. I really thought she was my soulmate. (Yes her, not Danny. Ha.)
3. Moved back home. Well Elmwood Park, not home home.
4. Bad fight with my mom.
5. Moved out/got kicked out. Moved in with Kimmy and Mike.
6. Bleach my hair blonde.

June:
1. Ran away to Alabama to live with Danny.
2. Job at Abercrombie, spent a lot of time standing around, getting free clothes.
3. Still haven't talked to my mom since the fight.

July:
1. Met Danny's family in Orlando. (Drove. Ugh.)
2. Missed the fireworks this year.
3. Broke.

August:
1. Mom finally returns calls. Recieve threats from Dad.
2. Move back to Chicago.
3. Dave Matthews show, magically bumped up to 4th row.
4. Start community college. Gay.

September:
1. New York with Daniel.
2. Birthday + one year anniversary.

October:
1. Packer Game with Dad and Danny.
2. ^ Enough weirdness to fill up the whole month.
3. Visit to Alabama.

November:
1. Las Vegas. Not for those under 21. :[

And I guess there's not really anything after that. Except New Years in Alabama, which was lame. Really really.
Days really drag on. And my permanent mood is "I miss Danny". Been apart a year. I actually didn't think it would last this long.

I guess I'm just used to being lonely every day. I'm trying, but failing, at finding a place we will both move to, so we can be together. Failing, currently.

Better luck in 2008 I hope.

Fri, 02 Mar 2007 17:23:18 GMT

Well, when everybody loves you, sometimes that's just about as fucked up as you can be.

Well, can't you hear me? 'Cause I'm dreaming. But I did not go outside yesterday.

Oh, don't wake me, 'cause I was dreaming, and I might just stay inside again today..

i miss my baby..

Thu, 01 Feb 2007 08:05:43 GMT

i want my danny to come back home. :/

xoxo.

And After All, You're My Wonderwall.

Mon, 11 Dec 2006 20:40:54 GMT



Hi you.	How was work today?	I love you.

Our hell ends every weekend.

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 23:58:00 GMT

Finals!

Thu, 23 Nov 2006 16:53:28 GMT

TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT KICKS OFF THE 2006 CHRISTMAS SEASON.

The Ex-Boyfriend Paintings.

Wed, 15 Nov 2006 00:54:50 GMT

TFM. <3. October 2004.

DJL. <3. October 2006.

All the things I hate. All the things I love. All the things I've heard. And all the things I've said. God bless you both. All the things I've learned.

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 19:22:10 GMT

I love him.

Tue, 17 Oct 2006 23:17:38 GMT

You've already won me over, in spite of me.

And don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet.

And don't be surprised if I love you, for all that you are.

I couldnt help it. Its all your fault.

Me and Tom need to ditch History and go get some hotdoggies.

Wed, 11 Oct 2006 19:14:09 GMT

I want to lick Anthony Kiedis.

Wed, 04 Oct 2006 16:48:52 GMT

I saw a rat today.
It's not as magical when you live here.

Fri, 29 Sep 2006 11:19:15 GMT

So does this make me a bad person?
Fuck.

Things to do:
1. Keep my head up.
2. Find SOMETHING positive about what happened.
3. Then find another postitive something, so I have more than one.
4. Stop trying to make anything better, but don't give up.
5. Clean my dorm.
6. Never take out the trash again.
7. Make Emily do it.
8. Make more pancakes at 4:30am, more often.
9. Stop swearing.
10. Download more Counting Crows.

Fffffff..
Does life always have to be bittersweet? Is that just how it works?

Tue, 26 Sep 2006 22:36:11 GMT

I'm sitting in class.
Have to make a collection based on anything.
Thinking about doing shadows.

Thinking about how everything changes so fast.
But its comfortable.
Should it be awkward?

Putting all the vegetables away that you bought at the grocery store today. And it goes fast, you think of the past.

Suddenly everything has changed.

Driving home the sky accelerates. And the clouds all form a geometric shape. And it goes fast, you think of the past.

Suddenly everything has changed.

I love the way you smell in the morning. *Smiles*.

Tue, 19 Sep 2006 14:33:16 GMT

I remember what it's lke to love myself.

Tue, 05 Sep 2006 17:13:23 GMT

Why do I always have to walk seven fucking blocks, if no one will walk them for me?
I never want to walk them again, because I know that they are now just a sacrifice.

I'm giving. I'm giving. I'm giving.
And I want it back.

Maybe I should just go home.

I'm an idiot.

Fri, 25 Aug 2006 17:04:53 GMT

I move into school tomorrow.

Everything around me in changing, and I don't like it.

The reason I went to school in Chicago is basically shot to hell.

I miss you, why are you so mean to me?

Things will get worse.

I should have never changed my mind back in October.

You aren't too cool for me, and stop acting too busy to say 'hi'.

I should have gone to Savannah.

Fuck.

Fri, 04 Aug 2006 17:56:48 GMT

It's been a very long time since I wrote in this thingy. Forgot I had it, really.

I'm not really sure how to update. I'm pretty good at making lists. Properly formatted lists, that is. Maybe I'll just make a bulleted list.
Okay let's do it, lettuce make a list of stark points- I'll call this list "Things that are weird"...

Ahem- THINGS THAT ARE WEIRD:

1.) High school is over and that's weird. All these people I've been friends with will eventually turn into contacts.

2.) My mom and George are getting married, which means we'll move again for the 9th time in my life.

3.) Me and my mom live in someone else's house right now. Spencer moved in with my dad, and me and my mom share a room in her friend Melanie's house, until she gets marred.

4.) Melanie has two really nice daughters, but I hide in my room when they have friends over. Because this isn't really my home.

5.) One of the girls I live with is in a car club, and they all own Evo's. One time I came home and there were four Evo's in the driveway.

6.) I leave for college in 22 days.

7.) I got my roommate in the mail, but I can't get a hold of her. :/ So I looked her up on MySpace and Facebook, and found who I'm 99% sure is her. But I feel like a loser, because she clearly hasn't tried to get a hold of me yet, which makes me really nervous. The girl I found has dreads, kind of. That's pretty cool I had unintentional dreads once. Oh well, maybe she's not even real. Then then then! I would have an imaginary roommate. Yar.

8.) What if she thinks I'm gay.

9.) Fuck.

10.) I have two friends with babies now. I used to not like babies. Now they are okay in my book. :D

11.) I misplaced two of my best friends, but I found them again this summer. Hi Claire and Miranda, welcome back to compulsive tanning and reading magazines.

12.) David "only drinks water now". This is a lie; David only drinks water and beer now. Nice try David, but you only fooled some people.

13.) I'm still totally freaked out about my roommate.

Jenna when are you coming home? I miss you. David when are you gonna stop being tired all the time, I miss you too.
Speaking of which, where is my health? I miss you too health. I've been sick for a month, waking up every night around 2am to cough my myself inside-out. I went to the doctor and apparently I have severe nasal drip. Neat. The medicine I'm on just makes my temporarily drunk so I can stumble around the bathroom and fall asleep on the toilet. Hmm.. it's pretty hot.

That's enough. I have to go start my next mural today. So I should probably go find my paint.

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 17:56:37 GMT

Does anyone know how to use FrontPage? I'm stumped. :(

Making meaning of our Creative Writing project.

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 06:32:45 GMT

W h e n T h e W o r l d E n d s .
by:Me. 4:You.

When the world ends
Darling,
I want to be with you.
When the world ends
Darling,
I want to take a walk,
Through back roads and fields.
And empty farmhouses,
Through ancient grey,
Where the memory of songbirds
Rings in our ears.

When the world ends
Darling,
I want to see it with you.
When the world ends
Darling,
I want to take a walk,
Through dark windowed cities.
Grown over with weeds,
Where the fast dying sun
Sets fire to streets.

When the world ends
Darling,
I want to love you.
When the world ends
Darling,
I want to take a walk.
Through soft- colored towns,
Where bicycles stand rusting
And paint floats off the homes.

When the world ends
Darling,
I want you to love me.
When the world ends
Darling,
I want to take a walk.
Through the dusky desert,
As our death from heat draws near.

When the world ends
Darling,
Let's watch it together.
As our bodies dissolve,
Under heavy night skies.
Lightened with stars,
And darkened with sorrow.

As our bodies dissolve
Darling,
Over glittering oceans, Rosy with blood.
As the earth breathes it's last

Breath to our kiss.

ILYsilly. <3